As you try to work harder on losing weight, you start to get conscious of your efforts. At the same time, many people will come to you and try to mock you.
Along the lines of – you aren’t going to become thin anyway, starving yourself isn’t the right approach, if you can’t even run for one round then what good are you. Often this comes from a place of jealousy.
Because they were on the same journey, you are now. And they failed terribly. So they don’t want you to succeed.
And other times, it is fueled by anger or frustration of some other thing, so they need to vent it out on someone. You just happen to be the outlet for them.
Out of all the criticism, mocking, and negative comments you get, about 80 to 90 percent fall in this category. Only a handful is genuine critics who want you to do better. You won’t be good at finding them among all the noise. So the best approach is to ignore the lot and work – as for the critics, choose them yourself, maybe your spouse, friend or hire a trainer to tell you the truth.
This thing keeps on repeating in various area of your life. Take, for example, your job. When you would be doing your job in the best possible way, someone will come to make you feel low.
When you would be going home after a long day for you, someone will interrupt to say you are going half day.
All of this happens because they are incompetent themselves and they want to project it to others. Also, when they can see you feel low because of their remarks, their sinister mind becomes happy.
The sane thing to do is to pick your battles. If you fight with everyone, then you will be stressed, and the real work won’t get done. So ignore most of them. Be graceful when you choose to reply to someone who is very harsh.
And make sure you silently complain about their behavior to your boss. Along with the report on your work, so your appraisal doesn’t get hampered.
You don’t fight barking dogs with barking. You call the concerned department to take them away. Slowly they will stop their remarks when they realize you aren’t bothered and instead get more focused on your work. Their ego won’t handle this indirect shaming.
Food For Thought
Often the people who are attacking you are using derogatory terms, and it seems natural to reply, them in similar words.
But that way, you are letting those narrative, words, and feelings inside you. Instead, you can choose to ignore or choose better, relevant words. For example, when they remark something rough about your personality, you may reply – anyway did you complete your report, which is delayed, the boss was asking.
This way, you aren’t letting yourself down to their level. And since this is a public discourse, they will be more humiliated because you pointed out their flaws in the work they were appointed to do.
Or you can simply walk past them and don’t respond. Ignoring someone’s presence hurts them.
But you are doing this to bad people. Either way make a point to showcase your boss your work and the lack of work by them subtly.
Your discourse, reply, and attitude will make you the person with those qualities. Choose them wisely; don’t let others choose it for you.